The pirate home of yarr dreams really does exist

Who didn't spend years of their childhood wishing that one day, they would grow up and become a pirate? That lifelong ambition got one step closer this month, as a five-bed property in California proves that the home of yarr nautical dreams really does exist.

The home, which is listed for just under $1.9 million, may look like a typical Spanish-style property to an ordinary landlubber, but there is booty concealed within that would leave even Captain Jack Sparrow lost for words. The property has been crafted bit by bit over 20 years, with the owner perfecting, improving and modernising each detail to form a veritable treasure trove of piratical dreams.

The ship's golden prize is surely the bar and games room, which boasts slot machines and a poker table for betting away your loot - not to mention a built-in bar and, of course, the thing every home needs: a life-sized pirate hanging from the ceiling.

The bedrooms sail even closer to the winds of absurdity, with each one stuffed with exposed beams, ornate windows, four-poster beds, a table for reading your treasure maps and pirate chests galore. "Red velvet" is the word of the day, followed closely by "arrrr".

Inside, hand-carved mermaids adorn the range in the kitchen, while outside, a lagoon-style swimming pool boasts waterfalls, grottos and an actual crow's nest from Captain Hook's ship in the film Peter Pan.

And what else is there for a pirate to do after a busy day raiding villages apart from pillage the wine cave (2,500 bottles), browse the long hallway of antique rum bottles and invite your crew of mateys round to sit in the 16-seat cinema. All you have to do to make your Jolly Roger dreams a reality is stump up the best part of $2 million. We'll provide the DVD of Pirates of the Caribbean.

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All photos: Realtor.com